Rucking Hell!: Podcast Ep1 Summer Internationals 1st Test Predictions

Hey guys, we've made out first podcast! We've gone about predicting this weekend's test matches. It's pretty raw and full of completely unfounded claims but we had fun making it and hope you enjoy!


 Have a good weekend and enjoy the rugby!




P.S. Ally has retracted his £10 bet

Rucking Hell!: Welsh Rugby’s new golden age?

Wales are coming off the back of a third 6 Nations Grand Slam in 7 years, a very successful RWC campaign with a young team and the Ospreys winning the Pro 12, playing some great rugby on their way. So all Welshmen should be expecting a series white-wash of a slightly dodgy looking Australia, Heineken cup finals next season, a decade of emulating the Greats of the 70s, dominating northern hemisphere rugby, right?

Well, while I think that Australia are absolutely there for the taking, the long term success many fans are beginning to expect could be further away than you might imagine.  The way I see it, we are on a knife-edge.  On one hand we have a group of proven internationals who can compete with the best, along with regions actually doing very well at unearthing and developing young talent that should figure for the national team in the near future – Rhys Webb, Ashley Beck, Liam Williams, to name a few that seem particularly promising. However, the regions are struggling to keep hold of big names and promising youngsters alike, after being throttled by salary caps and poor attendance at home matches. So where next? Are we at the pinnacle of the success of this group of players and the regional system they represent, or is this time of optimism in Welsh rugby just getting started?

This success of Welsh rugby as a whole will be judged by most on performance of the national team. At this point in time, I would like to think that we are only a few small pieces away from clicking and becoming a real force in world rugby, maybe even beating southern hemisphere teams! We have a coaching set up under Gats that really seems to work.  We have an excellent pack, with the tight five looking experienced and solid, while the loosies look dynamic and function well as a unit.  We are also blessed with a back line composed of talented small people Rhys Priestland and Leigh Halfpenny, plus some absolute freaks. And get this, we actually have selection issues! For someone who got really interested in Welsh rugby sometime around 2003-4, having genuine depth in key positions is the most exciting thing at the moment.  To leave Alun Wyn Jones, James Hook and Matthew Rees on the bench shows the quality Wales have in certain positions. It appears that the only positions we are thin on the ground at are prop and centre (I think some people may disagree with the latter, but I just think that centres should be able to pass, and think). Add in The Next Big Thing Ashley Beck – the young Ospreys’ centre looks to be the real deal, combining strength and an offloading game with great skills and awareness – and develop a young prop like Rhodri Jones (or teach Ryan Bevington to scrimmage) and we’re away!

The national team now has such a strong group of players that it should do very well, even without many new players coming into the set up. However, despite the 20 or so exceptional internationals playing in Wales right now, the regions are still not mounting a serious challenge at the business end of the Heineken cup, are suffering from dwindling crowd numbers and an exodus of talent they invested in nurturing. So the problem is this: could we end up with a great national team but a poor domestic game, with talented players establishing themselves in Wales before heading off for more money and better rugby week in week out? Worryingly, I have yet to hear any suggestions about what to about money in Welsh rugby that aren’t either idealistic and unviable, or out of touch.  I am particularly referring to a strategy outlined by David Moffet, involving central contracting, fairer divides in the regions and increased governing responsibilities at regional level – these are great ideas and the guy is talking sense, I just don’t think for a second it will ever happen. Nonetheless, for this tour to have considered players based in France next season Mike Philips, Aled Brew, Luke Charteris and co, it looks like in the future there will be nothing but a sense of blind patriotism keeping players at the regions.  As Moffet put it they become feeder clubs for the Aviva Premiership and Top 14. By and large, the attitude of Welsh fans to the regions was put perfectly by the former WRU Chief: “They [fans] are quite happy to support regionally produced players ... provided they are in the red Welsh shirt”).

What the WRU should do about these financial problems and level of support for regional teams is, frankly, beneath an over-enthusiastic fan like myself.  We are at a cross-roads. We are either satisfied with short term success and hope the domestic game sorts itself out, or we commit to restructuring the regions and the WRU, in the hope that we can build long term success – perhaps another Golden Age really is just around the corner.

So I leave you with an upbeat prediction for Saturday’s first test: Expect better conditions and fiery backlash from the Aussies after their loss to Scotland, but I see revenge for the World Cup defeat and the first southern hemisphere scalp of, hopefully, many – Wales by 6!

Team News:

Australia: 15 Adam Ashley-Cooper, 14 Joe Tomane, 13 Rob Horne, 12 Pat McCabe, 11 Digby Ioane, 10 Berrick Barnes, 9 Will Genia, 8 Wycliff Palu , 7 David Pocock (c), 6 Scott Higginbotham, 5 Nathan Sharpe, 4 Rob Simmons , 3 Sekope Kepu, 2 Tatafu Polota-Nau, 1 Benn Robinson.

Replacements: 16 Stephen Moore, 17 Ben Alexander, 18 Dave Dennis, 19 Michael Hooper, 20 Nic White, 21 Anthony Fainga'a, 22 Mike Harris.

Wales: 15 Leigh Halfpenny, 14 Alex Cuthbert, 13 Jonathan Davies, 12 Scott Williams, 11 George North, 10 Rhys Priestland, 9 Mike Phillips, 8 Toby Faletau, 7 Sam Warburton (c), 6 Dan Lydiate, 5 Luke Charteris, 4 Bradley Davies, 3 Adam Jones, 2 Ken Owens, 1 Gethin Jenkins.

Replacements: 16 Matthew Rees, 17 Paul James, 18 Alun Wyn Jones, 19 Ryan Jones, 20 Lloyd Williams, 21 James Hook, 22 Ashley Beck.

Rucking Hell!: Handsome XV

If you're anything like me, you're sick and tired of the wives, girlfriends, mothers and sisters complaining that you spend too much time watching rugby. They say they can't understand how someone can sit there and watch four back-to-back Super Rugby matches every Saturday.

Here's a little something for you to show them next time they complain. From charming smiles to chiselled abs, the Dream XV has it all to keep the woman in your life quiet whilst you get to enjoy the Summer Internationals! We're also hoping this post might get a few women to visit the blog!!

Enjoy and let us know what you think!!

1. Tendai Mtawarira (Natal Sharks)

With a smile that could melt the ice-caps, Tendai is the handsome XV loose head. Also, he's called The Beast...

2. Dimitri Szarzewski (Stade Français)

The French hooker clearly spends far more time grooming and posing for calendar shoots than he does on his attempts to secure the France no. 2 jersey! His glorious blond locks can be seen mincing around the Parisian pitch during the regular season...maybe Stade should work less on their posing and more on their rugby to try and make it to the playoffs!

3. Martin Castrogiovanni (Leicester Tigers)

I have been reliably informed by one of Castro's closest friends that the ladies love him. And who couldn't? Castro is not only ruggedly handsome but also owns his own Italian restaurants. The giant man is truly charming and adorable

4. Sebastian Chabal (Lyon)

The Caveman has become a sex-icon in France, even attracting his own followers who call themselves 'Les Chabalistes'. Women world-wide love him, even if he's an acquired taste. Maybe it's the beard and the long hair that offer a mysterious and allusive air that he lacks on the pitch.

5. Hugh Pyle (Melbourne Rebels)

Just when we were beginning to think that there were no rugby players who you could describe as conventionally 'attractive', along comes this chiselled young Australian lock. After his first season grinding away in the Rebels boiler room, we were shocked to see that a player who makes a career out of the ugly side of the game (hitting rucks without deserved praise) is in fact quite handsome. Having been picked for the Australian squad, things are looking up for Hugh.

6. Thierry Dusutoir (Toulouse)

This man has been credited with single handedly leading his team to the World Cup final. Not only that but he recently got voted the IRB player of the year. And also apparently women find him handsome....don't you just hate people like that? 

7. Liam Gill (Queensland Reds)

From my experience, girls like men with floppy "fashion" hair and young, unscathed faces. Right now, Reds' open side Liam Gill has both in spades. With his high turnover rate however (as shown below), it won't be long until that face is as scarred and battered as the rest of them. So enjoy him for now ladies. 

8. Sergio Parisse (Stade Français)

There must be a reason that the sensational Italian captain is married to former Miss Europe Alexandra Rosenfeld. It also comes as no surprise that there is another Stade player in the team - there's something about topless oiled men posing for calendar shoots that women find attractive...

9. Mike Phillips (Bayonne)

During the Rugby World Cup, the New Zealand Herald reported that Wales scrum half had been voted the sexiest man at the world cup, and who are we to disagree? Anyone that follows Mike on Twitter will be aware he certainly doesn't disagree. The size of a forward and the face of a back, what more could you ask from a scrum half?

10. Dan Carter (Canterbury Crusaders)

On the 2005 Lions Tour, Dan Carter took Jonny Wilkinson's place as the world's best fly half. And we here at TCI think he also topped him in the looks category. The arguments will continue for generations between about who the better fly half was - the wives and girlfriends can discuss the triviality of looks. 

11. James O'Connor (Melbourne Rebels)

James has fashion hair (highlights and everything), loves fashionable clothes and surfs. Come on ladies, what's not to like? By the way, James is 21 years old and already has 37 caps for Australia and 208 points. Show off. 

12. Sonny-Bill Williams (Waikato Chiefs)

SBW has become a national treasure in New Zealand. This is partly because of his powerful running, magnificent offloading and enormous tackling. It is partly because the rest of the world can't handle him (Peter de Villiers' rants are enough to make SBW a national treasure anywhere in the world!) It is also due, in part, to the fact that the ladies love him. Sonny-Bill is apparently a bit of a bad boy, something women are supposed to love. 

13. Wynand Olivier (Blue Bulls)

I once saw Wynand in a bar in Pretoria after the second Lions Test in 2009. I thought he was a bit short but he walked around the bar chatting up any girl he wanted, much to the distress of the helpless boyfriends. I also saw this on RugbyDump so I guess he's got to go in. 

14. Aurelien Rougerie (ASM Clermont Auvergne)

Another Frenchman to make the team. Ladies may love him for his blond locks but the most important thing here is that Rougerie is back on the wing where he is far better used. France insisted on playing him in the centres and moving scoring sensation Wesley Fofana to the wing during the 6 Nations. This confused us very much, so we're playing him on the wing. Take note Philipe.

15. Ben Foden (Northampton Saints)

Foden just had a kid with Una Healy from The Saturdays, enough said. After searching the internet for 14 attractive and predominantly topless men, I've had enough. So here's something a little different and a reward for getting all the way through this post! 

Rucking Hell!: Meyer Offers England Hope

A few days ago, TCI reported on Meyer's wider training squad and praised his balanced, if not expansive, selections. Today, Meyer announced his final training squad for the tests against England that begin next weekend and he has not disappointed us here by once more demonstrating that South African selection policy is still done with a blindfold and a random name generator.

When we reported on Meyer's suggestion that legend Victor Matfield may make a spectacular (idiotic) return to the international stage, we had a bit of a laugh and said - Meyer must not be watching the Super 15! This was meant as a tongue in cheek joke, of course the Springbok coach watches the Super 15!!!

Yet, with the announcement of today's final squad, we are once more left with the feeling that, not only does Meyer not watch Super Rugby, but he is in fact completely detached from the rugby world. Anyone who watches rugby will tell you (and Sky Sport's The Rugby Club never cease to wax about it), that England do not have an open side flanker. Under sized blindsides have toiled their hearts out since Neil Back retired but nobody has managed to fill the role of a specialist seven. In 2009, Heinrich Brussow burst onto the rugby scene with some unbelievable performances against the Lions and has continued to dominate the breakdown ever since. Meyer may argue that Brussow is out of form - but quite frankly this doesn't matter. Brussow is a world-class fetcher and from this season's evidence, a much improved carrier of the ball. He has been packing down at 8 for the Cheetahs in attack and can often be seen charging from the back of the scrum. Brussow would have given England nightmares at the breakdown; even if he isn't his usual world-conquering self, Lancaster would at least have to of prepared for Brussow. Robshaw's usual hustle and bustle would have been focused entirely on moving Brussow off the ball to give England any chance of quick ball that they desperately suffer to get.

The truly troubling problem is that Meyer has only picked only one open-side in uncapped Sharks' maverick Marcel Coetzee. Coetzee is a carrying open-side who charges recklessly into the nearest body he can see. His tunnel vision is unparalleled, and whilst effective, it is a little one dimensional. Other terrible selections include the injured and completely out of form Ryan Kankowski and the injured and completely unreliable Jacques Potgieter. Potgieter is a complete liability on both ends of the field. He is almost as blinkered as Coetzee and his reckless abandon in the tackle area is more dangerous than it is abrasive.

Brussow has essentially been dropped for two injured players. In the backs, the in form Joe Pieterson has been dropped for the ever disappointing Kirchener whilst the selection of Olivier over De Jongh screams of a completely defensive and negative game plan. This weekend the Stormers overcame the Bulls, yet only three men from Cape Town have made Meyer's squad (and Habana used to be a Bull).

Meyer has not failed to disappoint with another hugely controversial selection. Lancaster will be able to sleep a lot easier tonight and a series that was once a foregone conclusion is now back up for grabs.

Rucking Hell!: Hooper v. Gill: Who is Australia’s next great fetcher?

No nation, in recent years, has struggled as much as England to produce top quality openside flankers who have both skill on the floor and dynamism in the loose. Whether it is the brand of running rugby attributed to the drier climate or simply a natural talent inherent in the gene pool, the Southern Hemisphere is a conveyor belt for opensides who have fully mastered the dark art of the turnover. From Ritchie McCaw, branded as the ‘biggest cheat in world sport’, to the incredible talent and bulging biceps of David Pocock, it is undisputable that the masters of the breakdown reside in the Southern Nations. Two new faces have exploded onto the Super rugby scene this season, both have displayed they have what it takes to fill the Wallaby 7 shirt, however, who is Australia’s next great fetcher?

20 year old Michael Hooper and 19 year old Liam Gill have been frustrating, bewildering and generally annoying opposition on a consistent basis throughout this year’s Super 15 competition. Hooper plying his trade on Brumbies openside flank has helped his team to the top of the Australian conference and has recently been called into the Wallaby squad for the June internationals against Wales. Hooper standing at only 5 foot 11 and weighing 97kg is already developing a physique similar to that of Pocock but does he have skills at the break down to match? Surprising, Hooper has just 11 turnovers this year but combined with his ability to slow ball down on the deck, as well as his 160 tackles, he has become a highly influential figure for the Brumbies outfit. Super Hooper is undoubtedly a prestigious talent, blessed with an imposing presence, self-sacrificing bravery and an eye for a turnover… or so we here at The Certain Interpretation thought… DUN DUN DUHH!

Liam Gill is currently the starting openside flanker for the Queensland Reds and has been in pretty good form for the past 15 weeks of competition. Unexpectedly Gill is taller than Hooper at 6 foot 1 and weighs 95kg although on the pitch Hooper looks by far the superior physical specimen. First off it’s hard to believe Gill is actually as big as the statistics say he is, as he radiates fragility on the pitch. A comparison can be drawn between Gill and David de Gea, both small under-gymed and drowning in their shirts. However the statistics don’t lie. Gill has 23 turnovers this season, only one shy of Pocock, has made 155 tackles and only conceded 11 penalties. These stats are incredible when compared to Hooper’s 11 turnovers and 8 penalties. Hooper’s turnovers only outstrip his penalties by 28.2%... this is a pretty unimpressive margin. Gill on the other hand has a margin of 52.2% between his penalty count and his total number of turnovers. Statistically, in terms of fetching, Gill is nearly twice the player compared to Hooper.  

Animal instinct and our guts say Hooper but our brains and cold hard statistics say Gill. Quite the conundrum. The solution lies in the fact that Hooper is a more rounded player; he dominates the break down, carries reasonably well for a smaller dynamic flanker and has been known to make nearly 30 tackles a game. He does this whilst imposing his presence on the game… Hooper comes across as a big player bred for big matches. Gill is evidently more specialized in stealing the ball at the breakdown but does not offer the complete all rounded player that Hooper is and is becoming. The boy can’t carry… Although we have to remember he is only 19 so his physicality in the contact area and presence on the pitch will improve drastically over the next few years.

Personally, I would pick super Hooper every time. The stats can get stuffed! It comes down to an issue of all round game and most importantly PRESENCE, which Hooper has by the bucket load and Gill is yet to develop. It is a blessing that neither has taken the path of Derick Minnie who clearly believes he is one of the world’s best flankers, flopping all over the ball and achieving a horrendous penalty count of 26 so far this season. Please Derick, call it a day, you ruin the game as a spectacle (not that Lions games are ever much of a spectacle) and are giving a bad name to backrows everywhere.

Hungover as always,

LC